Right. Deep breath. Confession time.
The Riff Report has officially started playing Pokรฉmon Go.
There. We said it. Judge away ๐ค
But before anyone shouts โsell-outsโ or โmidlife crisisโ, letโs set the scene properly. This isnโt about chasing Pikachu for clout. This is about survival. Because when your daily routine includes gigs, late nights, keyboard warfare, and a frankly dangerous relationship with Greggs, something has to change.
And that somethingโฆ is steps. A lot of them.
๐ถโโ๏ธ FROM MOSH PITS TO POKรSTOPS
Somewhere between our fifth sausage roll of the week and another argument about who used the last Monster, it hit us. We needed to get outside. Touch grass. Move our legs. Do something vaguely resembling exercise.
Enter Pokรฉmon Go.
Now instead of pacing the newsroom like caffeinated goblins, weโre:
Walking between PokรฉStops like itโs a mini tour Taking over gyms with the same aggression we bring to barrier spots Catching Pokรฉmon outside venues, car parks, and questionable industrial estates Still thinking about Greggs. Constantly. Always.
Is it nerdy? Absolutely.
Is it working? Also yes.
Are we one incense away from calling this โwellnessโ? Probably.
๐ฅ THE RIFF REPORT ON TOUR (BUT ITโS JUST A WALK)
You might spot us wandering around Cardiff, Newport, or wherever the WiFi is strongest, phones out, muttering things like โthatโs a shinyโ and โWHO TOOK OUR GYM, BUTT?โ
This is what growth looks like. Allegedly.
โ ADD US, YOU LEGENDS
If youโre already on Pokรฉmon Go or fancy joining us on this strange, step-counting quest, get involved.
Trainer Code:
๐ 2383 2230 0279
Add us, send gifts, help us justify this as fitness instead of just another distraction disguised as self-improvement ๐
Rock journalists. Pokรฉmon trainers.
Still Welsh. Still loud. Still thinking about pasties.
Only in Wales, mun ๐ค๐ฅ










