WITH KORN SCREAMING โARE YOU READYYYYYโ INTO YOUR SOUL ๐ค๐ฅ
Forget fireworks. Bin off Auld Lang Syne. And respectfully tell the BBC countdown to do one.
If you want to actually welcome the new year properly, thereโs only one ritual that matters, and it involves nu-metal, distortion, and a scream that could crack time itself.
Hereโs the plan, mun. Itโs simple. Itโs beautiful. Itโs unhinged.
๐ค THE RIFF REPORT NEW YEARโS EVE RITUAL ๐ค
At 11:59:09pm on December 31st, press play on Blind by Korn.
Do NOT mess this up. Timing matters. Precision matters. This is science.
If done correctly, as the clock strikes midnight, Jonathan Davis will unleash the immortal words:
โARE YOU READYYYYYโ
And BOOM.
New year.
New chaos.
Same emotional damage.
โฑ๏ธ WHY 11:59:09PM? (YES, IT MATTERS)
Because the intro to Blind is a slow, creeping menace. That bassline stalks you. The tension builds. The room starts vibrating. People look concerned.
Then, right on midnight, Davis hits that scream like a sledgehammer through reality itself.
No polite countdown.
No awkward hugs.
Just pure sonic violence welcoming the year like a flying kick to the chest.
Poetry.
๐ง WHY THIS IS THE CORRECT WAY TO DO IT
Letโs be honest. The world is chaos. Your resolutions wonโt last. January is long. Itโs cold. Greggs stops feeling special by week two.
So why not start the year with something honest?
Blind isnโt about hope.
Itโs about confusion, frustration, and raw energy.
Which, letโs face it, is exactly what the next 12 months will probably deliver.
Starting the year with Korn is basically saying:
โWhatever happensโฆ Iโm ready to scream about it.โ
Thatโs mental health, that is.
๐ฅ THE VIBE CHECK
Picture it:
- Living room slightly trashed
- Someone holding a warm can
- Someone else shouting โTURN IT UPโ
- Neighbours silently judging
- Jonathan Davis screaming directly into the future
Chefโs kiss. Proper job. Only in Wales mun.
๐ฅ THE RIFF REPORT OFFICIAL INSTRUCTION ๐ฅ
Weโre calling it now:
Everyone reading this is legally and spiritually obligated to do this tomorrow night.
Film it. Share it. Shout it.
Tag your mates. Tag us. Tag your nan if sheโs into nu-metal.
Start the new year loud.
Start it sweaty.
Start it with Korn screaming into the void.
ARE YOU READYYYYY, 2026? ๐๐ค๐ฅ
