🔥A full-fat, fully-loaded Riff Report deep dive. Extra cheese. No 67.
What’s occurring, butt!? Gather round the neon glow of the drive-thru sign, because today’s headline tastes like chaos dipped in secret sauce.
In-N-Out Burger — the cult Californian burger temple worshipped by tourists, celebrities, and lads on their first trip to LA — has reportedly ELIMINATED order number 67 altogether.
Not discontinued the food.
Not changed the recipe.
Not replaced it with a vegan quinoa cloud.
No.
They deleted… the number.
Because the internet turned it into a circus. 🤦♂️🔥
Welcome to 2025, mun. Strap in.
🍟 The Birth of the 67 Chaos
It all kicked off when TikTok’s resident agents of anarchy realised that “Number 67!” shouted across a busy In-N-Out started sounding like something else entirely — something a bit cheeky, a bit suggestive, and absolutely guaranteed to make the staff question their life choices.
Within days, videos of customers cackling like gremlins went viral.
Within weeks, every drive-thru in California was echoing with teenagers reenacting the meme as if they were performing Shakespeare.
Employees tried to ignore it.
They tried to over-pronounce the number.
They tried to swallow the number entirely.
Nothing stopped the chaos.
The internet smelled blood. And free content.
🚫 The Corporate Tap-Out
Eventually, In-N-Out HQ — a company usually calmer than a Sunday afternoon queue at Greggs — reportedly said:
“No. Nope. Absolutely not. Bin it.”
And so, order 67 was retired like a disgraced football shirt.
Training manuals updated.
Registers reprogrammed.
Drive-thru staff rejoiced in quiet relief.
Somewhere, an intern was tasked with deleting the number from a company spreadsheet and probably cried into their Animal-Style fries.
It takes a lot to break a burger empire…
But TikTok teens? Unstoppable. 😈📱
🍔 Does This Affect Your Order?
Short answer: Not even slightly.
The burger still exists.
The fries still exist.
The milkshake that tastes like melted Californian sunshine still exists.
The only casualty is the number itself.
Poor 67. Gone but not forgotten. Probably trending on TikTok right now.
🏴 A Welsh Perspective (Because of Course)
Let’s be honest: if a Cardiff McDonald’s ever tried removing a number from the menu because teens were messing about, the valleys would riot.
Someone’s nan would be on BBC Wales demanding justice.
Someone’s uncle would chain himself to the drive-thru speaker.
It would be front-page news in every Spar from Wrexham to Swansea.
But America? They just shrug, say “ok cool,” and carry on munching fries the size of small tree branches. Proper job.
📣 The Bigger Picture
This isn’t just a silly fast-food story.
This is the internet bending a real-world company to its will.
Memes: 1
Global burger chains: 0
Society: probably doomed
But at least we got a laugh out of it, mun.
🤘 Final Word from The Riff Report
Order 67 didn’t die in vain.
It died a warrior’s death… slain by millions of phones pointed out of car windows.
Tonight, raise a milkshake in its honour.
Tell the story to future generations.
And remember:
If TikTok ever targets another number…
Companies might start deleting maths next.
Stay loud, stay silly, and stay tuned to The Riff Report, butt! 🍔🔥🤘
Michael is the founder, editor, and chief riff wrangler behind The Riff Report, an independent Welsh rock and metal publication built by fans, for fans. With a lifelong passion for loud guitars, unforgettable live shows, and the incredible community that surrounds rock and metal, he created The Riff Report to celebrate everything that makes the scene special—from legendary headline acts and grassroots venues to rising bands that deserve to be heard.
A familiar face at festivals across the UK, Michael spends much of the year covering events including Download Festival, Bloodstock Open Air, Steelhouse Festival, Firevolt, Plumpton Revival, and many more. Whether he’s battling the Welsh weather on a mountainside, surviving a weekend in a muddy campsite, or squeezed against the front barrier with thousands of fellow fans, he’s always searching for the next great story to share.
As editor of The Riff Report, Michael writes festival guides, breaking news, album reviews, gig reviews, interviews, opinion pieces, nostalgia features, and behind-the-scenes stories from across the rock and metal world. His writing combines honest opinions, humour, and a genuine love for live music, bringing readers closer to the bands, festivals, venues, and people that keep the scene alive.
Michael is particularly passionate about supporting independent artists, local venues, charities, and the wider UK rock and metal community. He believes every band deserves a chance to be discovered and every festival has a story worth telling. Through The Riff Report, he aims to shine a spotlight on both the biggest names in rock and the future stars waiting to break through.
When he’s not writing or interviewing artists, you’ll probably find him exploring festival campsites, photographing live shows, chatting with fellow fans over a pint, or planning the next road trip in search of more riffs, bigger crowds, and unforgettable moments.
Above all, Michael believes rock and metal are about more than music—they’re about community, friendship, and creating memories that last a lifetime. That’s exactly what The Riff Report exists to celebrate.
Proudly Welsh. Proudly Loud. Always chasing the next great riff. 🤘
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