One day. One stage. One monster rock show… and apparently one very dangerous merch tent.
STONedead Festival 2026 has revealed its official festival merchandise, and if you were planning on wandering into Newark with a healthy bank balance, you might want to rethink that strategy. 😈💰
From classic event T-shirts and hoodies to football shirts, trucker caps, mugs, patches, beanies and even a STONedead teddy bear, this year’s merch selection is absolutely stacked.
Yep.
A teddy bear.
Rock ‘n’ roll has officially reached peak cuddly. 🧸🤘
And with STONedead 2026 bringing another huge day of rock to Newark Showground, there’s going to be plenty here for festival-goers wanting something to remember the weekend by.
👕 THE STONEDEAD 2026 T-SHIRTS
Naturally, the mighty festival T-shirt remains at the centre of proceedings.
Because did you even attend a rock festival if you didn’t return home with another black T-shirt to add to the approximately 4,729 already occupying your wardrobe?
Exactly. 😂
Among the designs available are:
- Repping T-Shirt – £25
- Repping Tank Top – £25
- Kids T-Shirt – £25
- White Event Tank Top – £25
- White Event T-Shirt & Ladies V-Neck – £25
- I Was At T-Shirt & Ladies V-Neck – £25
- I Was At Tank Top – £25
- Black Event T-Shirt & Ladies V-Neck – £25
- Black Event Tank Top – £25
There’s also a Sold Out T-Shirt – £25, giving fans another cracking design to choose from.
Several of the event shirts feature the STONedead artwork on the front with the festival line-up proudly displayed across the back.
That’s basically the rock festival equivalent of a medal.
“Yes, I was there.”
Wear it proudly, butt. 🤘
⚽ THE £50 STONEDEAD FOOTBALL SHIRT
One of the biggest standouts from the entire collection has to be the STONedead football shirt, priced at £50.
Decked out in yellow and black with STONedead 26 proudly displayed across the design, it’s certainly going to stand out among the traditional sea of black band shirts.
Festival football shirts have become increasingly popular over recent years, and we can absolutely see this one becoming one of those pieces fans dig out year after year.
Festival field?
Pub?
Gig?
Trip to Greggs?
Perfectly acceptable attire for all four. 😂
🧥 HOODIES FOR WHEN THE BRITISH WEATHER DOES ITS THING
STONedead has also remembered one of the golden rules of attending an outdoor British rock festival:
Never trust the weather.
You could be applying Factor 50 at lunchtime and desperately searching for three additional layers by teatime.
The 2026 range includes:
I Was At Hoodie – £45
and
Black Event Hoodie – £45
Both look ideal for chucking into your festival bag ready for when the temperature inevitably drops.
And let’s face it, a festival hoodie isn’t just merch.
It’s survival equipment. 😂🌧️
🧢 BEANIES, CAPS & TRUCKER HATS
Fancy protecting your bonce while simultaneously advertising your excellent taste in festivals?
STONedead has you covered.
There’s a cracking selection of headwear available including:
Beanies – £15
These come in loads of different colours, including black, grey, red, blue and pink.
There’s also:
Pom-Pom Beanies – £15
Baseball Caps – £18
Trucker Cap – £18
So whether you’re preparing for glorious sunshine, sideways rain or that mysterious Newark weather system that somehow manages both within twenty minutes, there’s something here.
🧸 YES, THERE’S A STONEDEAD TEDDY
Potentially the most wholesome piece of festival merchandise we’ve seen in a while:
Teddy Bear With Event Shirt – £25
LOOK AT HIM.
The little legend even comes wearing his own STONedead event shirt.
That’s dangerous territory for anybody wandering around the merch tent after several beers.
“I don’t need a festival teddy bear.”
Five minutes later:
“His name is Lemmy and he’s coming home with us.”
😂🧸🤘
☕ STONEDEAD MUGS, COASTERS & MORE
The merch doesn’t stop with clothing either.
There are plenty of smaller souvenirs available if you’ve already spent most of your festival budget on food, drink and questionable late-night decisions.
Fans can grab:
- Programme Bundle – £15
- Cross Body Bags – £15
- Travel Mugs – £15
- Set of 4 Coasters – £10
- Slate Coasters – £8 each
- Pint Pots – £3 or 2 for £5
- Magnet – £3
- 2026 Circular Patch – £5
- Biker Patch – £5
That programme bundle includes a sticker, laminate, programme and poster, making it a tidy little souvenir package for collectors.
The biker patches in particular should go down very nicely with the leather-jacket brigade.
You know who you are. 😎🤘
🎸 A PROPER FESTIVAL MERCH HAUL
What we like about the STONedead range is that there’s something at practically every price point.
Want the full festival uniform?
Football shirt and hoodie.
Want the classic souvenir?
Grab an event T-shirt.
Want something smaller?
Patch or magnet.
Want a teddy bear wearing festival merchandise?
Apparently STONedead has anticipated that extremely specific requirement too. 😂
It’s exactly what festival merchandise should be: something fun that instantly transports you back to the day whenever you pull it out of the wardrobe, stick it on the fridge or drink your morning brew from it.
💰 RIFF REPORT MERCH TENT WARNING
Of course, we’re legally required* to issue the traditional Riff Report Festival Merch Warning™.
You will enter the merch tent saying:
“I’m only having a look.”
You will leave approximately fifteen minutes later carrying a T-shirt, hoodie, patch, mug, programme, hat and a teddy bear you’ve somehow become emotionally attached to.
This is simply festival science.
Don’t fight it.
*We’re not legally required whatsoever. We just enjoy enabling questionable festival purchases.
🔥 STONEDEAD 2026 – ONE DAY, ONE STAGE, ONE MONSTER ROCK SHOW
STONedead has built its reputation around a beautifully straightforward concept:
ONE DAY. ONE STAGE. ONE MONSTER ROCK SHOW.
No sprinting between stages.
No horrible clashes where two bands you’ve waited months to see inexplicably play at exactly the same time.
Just a full day of rock ‘n’ roll, one stage and thousands of fans having a proper good time.
And judging by the size of this merch collection, plenty of those fans will be leaving Newark with considerably heavier bags.
And considerably lighter bank accounts. 😂💸
The official STONedead 2026 merchandise will be available from the merch tent at the festival.
So get those wallets warmed up.
The Riff Report will see you in the field.
We’ll be the ones pretending we absolutely didn’t need another black festival T-shirt.
We did.
Obviously.
🤘🔥🎸
Proudly Welsh. Proudly Loud.
The Riff Report Blog
#Stonedead2026 #StonedeadFestival #RockFestival #FestivalMerch #TheRiffReport
